Something totally bazaar happened to me after we got Bear… My baby fever disappeared. I don’t know if it will come back or not. Will this satisfaction last forever? Have any other momma’s gone through this? While I know our family is not complete, I don’t HAVE to have a baby. I never thought I’d say that. I think I am thinking like a normal human being again. When I see a cute baby I say, “Aww that baby is so cute”. That’s a normal response. But I am no longer thinking of ways I can hold that baby for hours on end.
Anyway, I would love for Bear to have a brother to run around with, but I would love another little girl too. Honestly, I want to use both of the names I have planned for either a girl or boy. For this reason, I have seriously been thinking about international adoption…again. If you’ve been following my blog since the beginning you know my heart has always been in Africa. My mind has now expanded, I would love to bring a baby home that needs a home, and I don’t care where they are from.
So, what’s holding me back? I don’t know how on board The Hubs is. I know he would get on board if I told him that’s the path I wanted to take. I also have NO clue how we would come up for the money. We can BARELY afford another private domestic adoption, so raising more than double that? That’s what I just don’t know about. The thought of having extra money to put into classes and home improvements gets me really excited (every extra penny we’ve had has gone towards Bear’s adoption and now our next baby). Everyone has this amazing faith when it comes towards it, “if it’s in your heart don’t worry about the money”. That is some amazing faith. And I have seen it time and time again. But while I would love for God to be on my timeline we all know He doesn’t work like that. And to be honest I want Bear to have what Honey and Pumpkin have. So I would want to start asap, like yesterday. But in order to start now we would need money, lots of money. Plus it’s terrifying how slow Ethiopia is moving. While we aren’t 100% set on ET that would be my first choice. I would LOVE to meet our sponsor son.
To top it off. As I’ve been debating all of this a facebook friend posted this.
BLAH! HELP!!! What would you do? Seriously, what’s your input?