AHHH!!!!

Oh my goodness. I wasn’t going to update my blog until I caught up on my private Flickr account. This is taking WAY too long. Instead of being a year behind, I am only 8 months behind. haha Moral of the story, I take too many pictures of my kids.

So…we updated our homestudy and did our large family assessment. We are going to try for child #5. We are open to an african american or biracial child 0-4. We are switching agencies…and I feel awful about it. I LOVE our agency. I think they are the most ethical agency their ever was. I would recommend them over and over again. But I know this time, we will have a much harder time getting placed (if at all). They told me they would show our book if they didn’t have any waiting families for this particular child and if (s)he would fit in our checklist. That’s the kind of agency they are. Seriously, the best. But the fact of the matter is that they have a much smaller placement number and I know the families I’m “up against” hahaha. They are awesome. So we are going with a larger, but still state based, agency. Other families I know from our local adoption community have put my worries to rest and we are going for it. If it happens it happens, if it doesn’t, that is part of God’s plans. I told our agency that I would be keeping an eye on foster children available and would have them send my homestudy in for any child we think could be a match. Also, if by some act of God a child falls in our lap and we had an identified match, we would do the adoption through our agency.

Let the prayers begin. Our child could very much be alive right now and going through some traumatic situations. Our child could be conceived right now. Or God’s plan is for our four and there are no more (see what I did there).